Trust

I was interested to read the results of a new study on trust that targeted the elderly segment of our population.  I think many of us tend to believe that an individual's level of trust tends to decrease with age.  However, that is not what this study found.  The sutdy followed individuals of three different generations and it revealed that trust tends to increase, rather than diminish, as people grow older.

Claudia Haase, a co-author of the study, said, "Our new findings show that trust increases as people get older and, moreover, that people who trust more are also more likely to experience increases in happiness over time."  Although this increase in trust might lead an older person to become a victim of a fraud or a scam, there is not any evidence that such negative outcomes diminish the positive effects of trust, and there is a correlation between trust and well being.  (See reference below.)  I found this to be encouraging news!

However, when we work in the helping professions, we are bound to encounter some individuals--whether they are elderly or younger--who are reluctant to trust us, for one reason or another.  Sometimes this can make it difficult when we are trying to help them with issues or concerns.  If an individual does not really trust our judgments or have confidence in us, he or she may resist the help we offer them.  How, then, can we work at increasing the level of trust when we find ourselves in such a situation?

In thinking about how to answer this question, I came up with an acronym based on the word "TRUST".  I think it might be a useful guideline on how to build trust with another person as a helping professional.  The first word is "Truthfulness".  In order to gain the trust of someone we are trying to help, we need to be honest about who we are and what we can, and cannot, do for them--and we need to be ourselves.  The second word is "Respect".  Regarding each individual as a person with specific abilities, needs, circumstances, and preferences is very important.  We are not in charge of anyone's decisions, nor should we try to usurp that role.  The third word is "Understanding".  Even when we do not fully understand where the other person is coming from, we need to have an attitude of openness and of attempting to understand them as much as we can.  The fourth word is "Support".  When we are assisting someone as a helping professional, we need to empower them by giving them appropriate information, by offering emotional support when we can, and by sticking with them throughout the helping process.  The last word is "Time".  Trust does not always happen right away.  If an individual initially rejects our offer of help, that may change if we are willing to wait, give that person space, and take every opportunity to build up trust, without being pushy.  Remembering these five words and trying to practice them might help us to facilitate the process of building trust.

When we, as helping professionals, find ourselves in a situation where trust is lacking, let us be patient and remain open.  Perhaps the moment is not quite right and, with a little more time, the door will open and the trust will be there.

Quote and information taken from "Trust Increases with Age, Benefits Well Being:  New Research Suggests a Bright Side to Getting Older", by Julie Deardorff, March 18, 2015, found online at http://www.northwestern.edu/newscenter/stories/2015/3 .

Spring: Not Always a Time of Hope

I always get excited in the spring, seeing the flowers begin to blossom and the trees turn green once more.  The extra sunlight and the new growth that accompany each spring season make me feel like a new person, and I always anticipate their arrival.  Somehow, subconsciously, I guess I expect everyone else to feel the same way I do.  However, springtime is not necessarily a joyous season for everyone.

I was interested to discover recently that Seasonal Affective Disorder not only occurs during the fall and winter, but can also occur during the spring and summer.  This is apparently a rare form of SAD, but it does affect some people in this way.  According to Web MD's article on SAD, the symptoms of the spring and summer form of this disorder are trouble sleeping, decreased appetite, and weight loss. When working with elderly and disabled persons, I think it is important to know that this variation of Seasonal Affective Disorder exists and that it can result in these problems. It might be a contributing factor to the depressed mood  of some of the individuals we seek to help and support in our work.

Another factor to note is that for some individuals, springtime may be accompanied by bittersweet memories, such as the loss of a loved one or a life transition that has been traumatic,  Instead of awakening feelings of joy and anticipation, the spring season might stir up pain, anxiety, and sadness. This is just the opposite of what many of us feel at this time of the year, but the experience is just as valid.  And perhaps being surrounded by signs of new life makes the difficult memories even more painful.

Of course, we cannot change the seasons or people's reactions to them, and we all respond differently to various times of the year.  But having at least some awareness of how these seasonal transitions can affect others may help us to be more supportive and compassionate as we work with them.  That, I think, is the bottom line in all our work.

Everyone Has a Story

I have been pondering the fact that in our society, we are very quick to attach labels to people.  It is very easy to look at an individual and place him or her in some type of box, or often multiple boxes, without considering the various factors and influences that have shaped that particular person and make them the person that they are.

I think almost everyone is guilty of labeling and categorizing people, and I believe this can be particularly true when one works in one of the helping professions.  For those in the medical profession, I think it is probably easy to think of a particular patient as "this elderly woman who is diabetic and suffers from hearing loss", or "this man who has prostate cancer and is facing a knee replacement", and not necessarily to see the whole person in the process.  By the same token, I think service coordinators, social workers, and those in similar professions can easily think of an individual coming to them for help as "this young man who is on dialysis and needs Medical Assistance" or "this young woman who is bipolar and needs to find a therapist".  

Everyone has a story, but how often do we take the time to find out something about that story?  I realize that in the helping professions, not every encounter with a person in need will present the opportunity to find out something about that individual's unique story.  But sometimes I think people are ready to share something about their own background, their own story, that could assist us in determining the best ways to help them.  Perhaps they have had positions of leadership and can readily take charge of their own care, once they are given some direction.  Perhaps they have always been dependent on other people and need a little more guidance, and encouragement, as the best course of action is determined.  And maybe they have anecdotes to share and just need someone to listen for a few minutes, as they reveal a part of their own story with someone who shows that they care.  

How can we be more open to the story of each person we encounter as individuals who serve in the helping professions?  How do we show that we are interested in who they are and in what their journey has been?  Maybe it is mostly a matter of really listening for openings as we converse with those who come to us for help, and taking the opportunity to find out something about their own unique story as we seek to help them continue on their journey in life.  And sometimes we can share a little of our own story, too.   Just think of how we might encourage and inspire each other if we seek to do this!